1 00:00:09,887 --> 00:00:12,157 ♪♪ That-that-that-that Is right on time ♪♪ 2 00:00:12,224 --> 00:00:13,762 ♪♪ Is right on time ♪♪ 3 00:00:14,028 --> 00:00:15,865 ♪♪ That crazy beat Is right on tim ♪♪ 4 00:00:16,032 --> 00:00:17,068 ♪♪ Is right on time ♪♪ 5 00:00:17,267 --> 00:00:18,904 [screaming, whooping] 6 00:00:19,138 --> 00:00:21,142 What the fuck kind of friend would I be if I fucking said that? 7 00:00:21,275 --> 00:00:23,112 -No. Then you look bad. -"You're ugly"? 8 00:00:25,050 --> 00:00:25,885 [screams] 9 00:00:25,952 --> 00:00:27,522 [whooping] 10 00:00:27,589 --> 00:00:28,858 [coughs] 11 00:00:28,925 --> 00:00:31,062 -Oh. Okay. [chuckles] -You're evil. You're evil. 12 00:00:31,129 --> 00:00:32,464 Okay, no. I needed this. 13 00:00:32,565 --> 00:00:34,135 -You just wanted to join. -You're evil. 14 00:00:34,201 --> 00:00:35,403 -All right. Another round. -[Paul] For sure. 15 00:00:35,538 --> 00:00:36,373 -Uh, what's your tab? -Thank you. 16 00:00:36,573 --> 00:00:37,642 Uh, Billie Schaeffer. 17 00:00:39,411 --> 00:00:41,750 I'm sorry, uh, can I see your ID? 18 00:00:42,451 --> 00:00:44,455 Yeah. Yeah, of course. 19 00:00:51,069 --> 00:00:52,271 Huh. 20 00:00:52,805 --> 00:00:54,776 You can't arrest us. We're filming. 21 00:00:54,843 --> 00:00:57,147 [♪♪ theme music playing] 22 00:01:12,311 --> 00:01:13,747 [Billie] Okay, so what happened exactly? 23 00:01:13,847 --> 00:01:16,118 Okay, so I was covering a shift for my bartender buddy 24 00:01:16,252 --> 00:01:18,223 and this girl handed me a New Jersey license 25 00:01:18,289 --> 00:01:20,060 that said Billie Schaeffer. 26 00:01:20,127 --> 00:01:23,199 -What was the address? -Uh, like, 40, uh, Trenton something. 27 00:01:23,266 --> 00:01:25,805 Forty-two Sycamore Lane, Trenton, New Jersey 08605? 28 00:01:25,805 --> 00:01:27,374 Wait, Platinum Blonde? 29 00:01:27,441 --> 00:01:29,613 She's still in rotation. -Wait, what's Platinum Blonde? 30 00:01:29,646 --> 00:01:33,821 Billie had this legendary fake ID in high school. It scanned. 31 00:01:34,121 --> 00:01:36,961 It had a hologram, came in a hollowed-out Bible. 32 00:01:37,027 --> 00:01:38,998 -Nice. -All right. 33 00:01:39,065 --> 00:01:41,002 This is crazy. I mean, when I turned 21, I passed it down to Katie Hobert, 34 00:01:41,069 --> 00:01:43,307 and then Katie Hobert passed it down to Lauren Gould, 35 00:01:43,373 --> 00:01:45,310 who passed it down to Missy Wheeler, 36 00:01:45,511 --> 00:01:48,049 but then Missy Wheeler found Jesus and deleted Instagram, so I lost track. 37 00:01:48,249 --> 00:01:50,621 Okay, well, current Fake Billie was going absolutely insane last night. 38 00:01:50,688 --> 00:01:52,759 -[Billie gasps] No way. -[Paul] She was, like, downing shots 39 00:01:52,826 --> 00:01:54,696 and started bodysurfing these McKinsey interns. 40 00:01:54,763 --> 00:01:56,232 She was cool. 41 00:01:56,299 --> 00:01:58,837 You know what? You could not pay me to be that age again. 42 00:01:58,837 --> 00:01:58,871 You know what? You could not pay me to be that age again. -Could not pay me. -Same. 43 00:01:58,871 --> 00:02:00,473 -Could not pay me. -Same. 44 00:02:00,675 --> 00:02:02,579 You know, literally same. 45 00:02:02,745 --> 00:02:04,650 Like, for the first time, we're not the youngest people on Earth anymore. 46 00:02:04,783 --> 00:02:06,687 -[Billie] Mmm. -Honestly, thank God. 47 00:02:06,753 --> 00:02:07,956 Yeah. 48 00:02:08,290 --> 00:02:10,293 Hey, should I, like, reach out to her? 49 00:02:10,460 --> 00:02:12,465 -To Fake Billie? -[Billie] Yeah. 50 00:02:12,565 --> 00:02:14,703 I-I mean, do you want to reach out to her? 51 00:02:14,769 --> 00:02:16,740 -Oh, no, no, not-not for my sake. -Oh. 52 00:02:16,840 --> 00:02:19,212 But like, you know, she could use my advice, right? 53 00:02:19,278 --> 00:02:23,119 Like, I could help her skip over all the mistakes of her 20s. 54 00:02:23,353 --> 00:02:25,356 -[Anton] Mmm. You're the person for that. -[Issa] Yes. 55 00:02:25,457 --> 00:02:27,161 -Yeah, I bet she'd love that. -[Billie] Right? 56 00:02:27,227 --> 00:02:29,198 Okay, I'm gonna text Lauren Gould 57 00:02:29,265 --> 00:02:30,702 and get in touch with the Billie network. 58 00:02:31,469 --> 00:02:35,611 Alex Able, that's the name of the kid I gave my fake to. 59 00:02:35,745 --> 00:02:37,582 Damn, I haven't thought about him in years. 60 00:02:37,849 --> 00:02:40,521 -[Issa] Mmm. -Fake Samir's probably in Congress by now. 61 00:02:40,621 --> 00:02:43,193 -Yeah, maybe. I don't know. -M-Maybe. Uh-huh. 62 00:02:43,459 --> 00:02:46,733 -Or he could be doing porn in the valley. -Mmm. That. 63 00:02:46,733 --> 00:02:48,303 I see that more for him. 64 00:02:48,436 --> 00:02:50,107 -Good porn. -Yeah, tasteful porn. 65 00:02:50,173 --> 00:02:51,476 -Porn where they kiss. -Kissing porn. 66 00:02:51,610 --> 00:02:53,413 -[Issa] So cute. -[Anton] Yeah, yeah, yeah. 67 00:02:55,417 --> 00:02:57,387 -[Billie] Aw. -[Issa] Do you feel like a mom? 68 00:02:57,454 --> 00:02:59,192 [chuckling] Yeah. Well, not a mom. 69 00:02:59,458 --> 00:03:01,262 -But more of like a mentor. -You feel like a mentor. Yeah. 70 00:03:01,329 --> 00:03:03,099 -Lavender matcha with honey. -Ooh. 71 00:03:03,332 --> 00:03:05,504 -[whispers] Let's go. Ready? [chuckles] -Yeah. [chuckles] 72 00:03:09,512 --> 00:03:10,948 [whispers] No. I didn't know 73 00:03:11,215 --> 00:03:13,687 -Um, did you guys order the matchas? -She did. 74 00:03:14,288 --> 00:03:17,260 -Yeah, I did. -Okay. 75 00:03:17,862 --> 00:03:19,331 Oh, my God. 76 00:03:19,398 --> 00:03:20,701 -She didn't realize. [chuckles] -She doesn't know. 77 00:03:20,768 --> 00:03:23,507 -Uh, you ready? -[whispers] Blow her mind. 78 00:03:27,314 --> 00:03:28,517 It's me. 79 00:03:28,817 --> 00:03:30,688 -[Billie chuckles] -[chuckles] And it's me. [chuckles] 80 00:03:30,721 --> 00:03:31,890 [chuckling] 81 00:03:32,592 --> 00:03:37,769 Billie Schaeffer, 42 Sycamore Lane, Trenton, New Jersey 08605? 82 00:03:38,670 --> 00:03:40,006 Oh, my God! 83 00:03:40,073 --> 00:03:41,877 -[Billie chuckles] Yeah. -There it is. I was like, 84 00:03:41,943 --> 00:03:43,981 -"Is she gonna get there? Is she gonna" -Check, please. 85 00:03:43,981 --> 00:03:45,651 -But you got there, girl. -Just kidding. Don't bring us the check. 86 00:03:45,751 --> 00:03:47,755 -Garrett, this is Billie. -[Billie chuckles] 87 00:03:47,755 --> 00:03:47,756 -Garrett, this is Billie. -[Billie chuckles] -The fake ID. [chuckles] -[chuckles] We thought it was AI randomly. 88 00:03:47,756 --> 00:03:50,227 -The fake ID. [chuckles] -[chuckles] We thought it was AI randomly. 89 00:03:50,493 --> 00:03:52,097 [Garrett] Oh, my God. -Kiss the ring. Kiss the ring. 90 00:03:52,364 --> 00:03:54,067 -No, don't kiss the ring. [chuckles] -[chuckling] 91 00:03:54,134 --> 00:03:56,406 -No, it's like I'm you in the future. -Right. It's so-- 92 00:03:56,506 --> 00:03:57,676 -Hi. -Things are looking good. [chuckles] 93 00:03:57,743 --> 00:03:59,111 -Hold on. Okay, um -No way. 94 00:03:59,344 --> 00:04:00,615 How old are you? 95 00:04:00,781 --> 00:04:02,919 -Um, I just turned 25. -Mm-hmm. 96 00:04:02,986 --> 00:04:04,155 [stammers] 97 00:04:04,354 --> 00:04:06,426 -Wow, um -So fun. 98 00:04:06,660 --> 00:04:08,397 That's awesome. 99 00:04:08,463 --> 00:04:13,106 [sighs] Twenty-five. So, you were around for, like, 9/11 and such? 100 00:04:13,272 --> 00:04:14,509 -No. -I mean, technically. 101 00:04:14,676 --> 00:04:16,412 -Yeah. -But I was just a baby. 102 00:04:16,846 --> 00:04:19,786 Helaine! Can we get a croissant for the lady? 103 00:04:19,919 --> 00:04:21,590 'Cause she was there during 9/11. 104 00:04:21,657 --> 00:04:23,861 Not a lady, so [chuckles] 105 00:04:23,928 --> 00:04:27,569 [clears throat] Um, wait, such cute little freaking stamps. 106 00:04:27,668 --> 00:04:29,405 -Where did you get those? -Ooh, yeah. 107 00:04:29,706 --> 00:04:34,482 Oh, um, it's this new club Uncle Tuesday on Avenue A. 108 00:04:34,550 --> 00:04:36,854 -Oh, we haven't been yet. -Cool. Yeah. 109 00:04:36,887 --> 00:04:38,524 -You guys will probably hate it. -Hate it. Hate it. 110 00:04:38,591 --> 00:04:41,262 -It's, like, young people. -Uh, I don't know. 111 00:04:41,530 --> 00:04:43,834 -I think I'd like it. I think I'd like it. -Ooh. 112 00:04:43,901 --> 00:04:45,972 -Right, Iss? -[chuckles, stammers] I [chuckles] 113 00:04:46,039 --> 00:04:47,742 Wait, crazy idea. 114 00:04:47,809 --> 00:04:49,813 We should all swing by Uncle Tuesday together sometime. 115 00:04:49,879 --> 00:04:51,617 -Sounds like my kind of spot. [chuckles] -[Issa] Mmm. 116 00:04:51,683 --> 00:04:55,290 -Um, you know, I-I would love to. -[Garrett] Love. 117 00:04:55,357 --> 00:04:59,298 But, um, basically, I-I left your ID in a cab last night. 118 00:04:59,365 --> 00:05:00,668 [Garrett] It's gone. 119 00:05:00,735 --> 00:05:02,605 -It's gone. Yeah. -We're so sad about it. 120 00:05:02,672 --> 00:05:04,408 -Really sad actually, um -I know. 121 00:05:04,475 --> 00:05:06,780 But you guys enjoy your matchas, okay? 122 00:05:06,846 --> 00:05:11,623 And, uh, keep rocking that haircut. Yeah. 123 00:05:11,690 --> 00:05:14,061 Well, I'm growing it out, so it's a transitional phase. 124 00:05:14,094 --> 00:05:16,499 -She's not -This isn't the length that it's gonna be. 125 00:05:16,567 --> 00:05:19,472 Oh, my God. This is crazy. 126 00:05:19,572 --> 00:05:21,376 -Okay, he's not on LinkedIn. -[Issa gasps] 127 00:05:21,576 --> 00:05:24,181 -He's not in Congress. This is a bad sign. -Samy, chill, dude. 128 00:05:24,448 --> 00:05:27,488 Whatever Fake Samir's up to now is not your responsibility. 129 00:05:27,588 --> 00:05:29,593 Yet I feel responsible, okay? Think about it. 130 00:05:29,692 --> 00:05:30,995 I started this guy's drinking journey. 131 00:05:31,128 --> 00:05:33,066 He probably started somebody else's, 132 00:05:33,132 --> 00:05:35,638 and I could have created a whole lineage of curly-haired degenerates. 133 00:05:35,738 --> 00:05:38,678 Calm down, Samir. Once you pass down a fake ID, 134 00:05:38,744 --> 00:05:40,079 -it just belongs to the world. -[Paul] Mm-mmm. 135 00:05:40,146 --> 00:05:41,850 -It's like sending a nude. -[Samir sighs] 136 00:05:41,917 --> 00:05:43,921 -No. -See, this is why I never had a fake. 137 00:05:43,987 --> 00:05:45,190 You never had a fake? 138 00:05:45,257 --> 00:05:46,492 No, I never needed one. 139 00:05:46,626 --> 00:05:48,096 -I used the method. -[Paul] Mmm. 140 00:05:48,396 --> 00:05:49,933 -What's the method? -You don't know the method? 141 00:05:49,999 --> 00:05:52,505 -You do know the method? -Yeah, I know the method. 142 00:05:52,572 --> 00:05:54,374 Anton and I go out sometimes. 143 00:05:55,645 --> 00:05:57,280 It's Billie. Billie, what are you doing? 144 00:05:57,480 --> 00:05:58,885 Guys, announcement. 145 00:05:58,951 --> 00:06:01,021 -We're going out tonight. -[Issa] Oh, my God. Pants. 146 00:06:01,021 --> 00:06:01,055 -We're going out tonight. -[Issa] Oh, my God. Pants. -Whoa! Ooh. -We are? 147 00:06:01,055 --> 00:06:02,626 -Whoa! Ooh. -We are? 148 00:06:02,825 --> 00:06:05,297 Yes. Come on, I wanna dance. 149 00:06:05,531 --> 00:06:08,671 We haven't danced in [singsongy] uh-uh-uh, forever. [chuckles] 150 00:06:08,738 --> 00:06:11,309 Uh-huh. How did it go with Fake Billie? 151 00:06:11,376 --> 00:06:13,145 Oh, Sophie-Rose? 152 00:06:13,145 --> 00:06:13,213 Oh, Sophie-Rose? -Uh, great. Yeah. -[Anton] Oh. 153 00:06:13,213 --> 00:06:15,250 -Uh, great. Yeah. -[Anton] Oh. 154 00:06:15,450 --> 00:06:16,720 [Billie] She was great. 155 00:06:16,886 --> 00:06:18,422 Uh, she did lose my fake ID. 156 00:06:18,489 --> 00:06:20,159 -She lost it? -Wait. Platinum Blonde? 157 00:06:20,159 --> 00:06:20,227 -She lost it? -Wait. Platinum Blonde? Yeah, but you know what I realized? 158 00:06:20,227 --> 00:06:22,163 Yeah, but you know what I realized? 159 00:06:22,163 --> 00:06:22,164 Yeah, but you know what I realized? Thank God, I don't need that thing anymore because we are older now. 160 00:06:22,164 --> 00:06:26,072 Thank God, I don't need that thing anymore because we are older now. 161 00:06:26,139 --> 00:06:28,476 -Yeah. -But also younger than we'll ever be. 162 00:06:28,544 --> 00:06:30,146 -Well -Come on, Samir, get dressed. 163 00:06:30,413 --> 00:06:32,619 -We're going to Uncle Tuesday. -[stammers] Uncle Tuesday. 164 00:06:32,685 --> 00:06:35,356 Delulu. Things used to be called things. 165 00:06:35,423 --> 00:06:36,526 [laughs] 166 00:06:36,960 --> 00:06:38,864 -Paul Baker, you coming out? -[Paul] Mm-mmm. 167 00:06:38,964 --> 00:06:40,701 Tonight is me and Paul Baker's cozy night in. 168 00:06:40,768 --> 00:06:42,404 -Yes. -We haven't had a date night in so long. 169 00:06:42,638 --> 00:06:44,074 [sighs] Boring. 170 00:06:44,141 --> 00:06:46,178 -We're just gonna relax, make some salmon -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 171 00:06:46,245 --> 00:06:47,748 -do some anal. -Mm-hmm. 172 00:06:47,848 --> 00:06:49,051 -Martha Stewart says it's great. -She does. 173 00:06:49,184 --> 00:06:50,821 -The salmon? -You poor sweet girl. 174 00:06:50,888 --> 00:06:52,190 -No. -[whispering] No. 175 00:06:55,931 --> 00:06:58,303 -Anton, we can't just skip the line. -Yes, we can, trust me. 176 00:06:58,436 --> 00:07:00,373 Just let me do my thing, please. 177 00:07:00,541 --> 00:07:03,379 Hi, hi. We're-We're on the list. 178 00:07:03,446 --> 00:07:05,551 -Whose list? -It's Zach Carp's list. 179 00:07:05,684 --> 00:07:07,287 He's friends with Jessica Palmari. 180 00:07:07,354 --> 00:07:09,158 I don't see a Zach Carp. 181 00:07:09,224 --> 00:07:11,797 I'm so sorry. So, Jessica Palmari works with Nicole Berman, 182 00:07:11,963 --> 00:07:13,935 whose husband owns the club. 183 00:07:14,468 --> 00:07:16,039 The owner's name is Steve Winslow. 184 00:07:16,105 --> 00:07:18,744 Winslow, Steve Winslow. Yes. No, he's just the day-to-day. 185 00:07:18,810 --> 00:07:20,648 So, Nicole Berman's husband 186 00:07:20,715 --> 00:07:22,719 works for the private equity company that invested in the club. 187 00:07:22,786 --> 00:07:24,690 So, uh, let me explain, it's a lot of moving parts. 188 00:07:24,889 --> 00:07:27,595 There's a board of directors, right? Tad Marberg, David Corpeland. 189 00:07:27,695 --> 00:07:29,599 There's a woman as well, Jennifer Jesman and then-- 190 00:07:29,666 --> 00:07:31,670 All right, all right. [sighs] Just come inside. 191 00:07:31,836 --> 00:07:33,340 Yeah, thank you, thank you. 192 00:07:33,874 --> 00:07:34,910 [whispering] The method. 193 00:07:34,977 --> 00:07:36,446 -And what's your name? -Chris. 194 00:07:36,579 --> 00:07:38,482 -Oh, great. Chris. Are you new? -Yeah. 195 00:07:38,717 --> 00:07:39,619 Hi, Chris. 196 00:07:39,686 --> 00:07:42,658 [♪♪ club music plays] 197 00:07:45,864 --> 00:07:47,802 -Oh, he said he'd be here by now. -Who? 198 00:07:47,869 --> 00:07:49,706 -Fake Samir. -You texted Fake Samir? 199 00:07:49,773 --> 00:07:52,745 I texted Fake Samir, yeah. My imagination's been running wild, Anton. 200 00:07:52,878 --> 00:07:54,716 What if he's selling smack in an alley? 201 00:07:54,782 --> 00:07:55,952 Smack? Who says smack? 202 00:07:56,018 --> 00:07:57,689 He was in Rent in tenth grade. 203 00:07:57,788 --> 00:07:59,091 I played Mark, okay? He's the audience's way in. 204 00:07:59,124 --> 00:08:00,594 [both chuckle] 205 00:08:02,263 --> 00:08:04,334 Oh, my God. 206 00:08:04,502 --> 00:08:06,205 -[Garrett] Yes! -[chuckling] 207 00:08:06,272 --> 00:08:08,242 That fucking liar. 208 00:08:12,418 --> 00:08:13,688 [Samir] Billie. 209 00:08:14,187 --> 00:08:16,425 -Oh, my God, hi! -Oh, shit, hi! [laughs] 210 00:08:16,593 --> 00:08:19,297 I thought you lost my ID. 211 00:08:19,532 --> 00:08:24,542 Oh. Yeah, no, I did. I did, but then then I found it, girl. 212 00:08:24,609 --> 00:08:26,478 -[squeals] -Oh, my God. 213 00:08:26,546 --> 00:08:28,917 Okay, so, Sophie-Rose, maybe no one's ever told you this before, 214 00:08:28,984 --> 00:08:32,290 but you shouldn't bite the hand that feeds you, okay? 215 00:08:32,290 --> 00:08:32,324 but you shouldn't bite the hand that feeds you, okay? Just a little advice for you. 216 00:08:32,324 --> 00:08:33,827 Just a little advice for you. 217 00:08:34,027 --> 00:08:35,664 I'm sorry, who is this? 218 00:08:35,898 --> 00:08:38,871 Um, it's just some woman that keeps trying to hang out with me. 219 00:08:39,071 --> 00:08:41,109 Okay, so not a woman. 220 00:08:41,175 --> 00:08:45,450 I'm 25, which actually Maxim says is the hottest age to be, so. [chuckles] 221 00:08:45,651 --> 00:08:47,822 Is Maxim your husband? 222 00:08:48,924 --> 00:08:50,060 You know what? 223 00:08:50,427 --> 00:08:53,834 You guys enjoy your little watered-down cocktails, okay? 224 00:08:53,901 --> 00:08:55,538 'Cause I'm here tonight 225 00:08:55,771 --> 00:08:57,340 Hear that? Yeah. 226 00:08:57,541 --> 00:08:59,244 to have some fucking fun! 227 00:09:06,091 --> 00:09:07,595 Pants. 228 00:09:09,297 --> 00:09:12,972 I feel like she really wants you to notice her pants. 229 00:09:15,477 --> 00:09:18,082 [Alex] Samir. Samir. 230 00:09:19,151 --> 00:09:20,287 Oh, my God. Hey. 231 00:09:20,354 --> 00:09:21,856 How are you doing? 232 00:09:21,923 --> 00:09:23,459 -Oh, thanks for reaching out, dude. -Oh. Yeah. 233 00:09:23,527 --> 00:09:24,963 Oh, it's been too long, dude. 234 00:09:25,129 --> 00:09:26,633 -Yeah, yeah, it has been. -Yeah. 235 00:09:26,866 --> 00:09:28,570 How you doing? 236 00:09:28,637 --> 00:09:30,006 -I'm good, man. I'm good. -You're good? You're good? You're okay? 237 00:09:30,173 --> 00:09:31,576 -I'm great. Yeah. -Yeah? 238 00:09:31,709 --> 00:09:33,681 Uh, kinda getting railed at work, but 239 00:09:33,880 --> 00:09:36,151 Railed. In the valley? 240 00:09:36,686 --> 00:09:37,756 No, I'm 241 00:09:37,888 --> 00:09:40,059 I'm in advertising here in the city. 242 00:09:40,928 --> 00:09:42,030 Oh, my God. 243 00:09:42,698 --> 00:09:44,970 -Yeah, I was a communications major. -He's a communicator. 244 00:09:45,036 --> 00:09:47,675 Yeah. And I'm an uncle now. 245 00:09:47,842 --> 00:09:49,478 -You're an uncle now? -Yeah. 246 00:09:49,712 --> 00:09:50,881 He's an uncle! 247 00:09:51,081 --> 00:09:52,117 -Oh. -Yeah. 248 00:09:52,250 --> 00:09:54,822 We have a baby. Show me. Show me. 249 00:09:54,989 --> 00:09:57,026 -This is Brinley. -Ah. 250 00:09:58,630 --> 00:09:59,866 He looks just like us. 251 00:10:05,878 --> 00:10:06,880 [Paul] That was fun, eh? 252 00:10:06,946 --> 00:10:08,583 -Very fun. -Uh-huh. 253 00:10:09,084 --> 00:10:12,725 What a perfect romantic night. 254 00:10:16,398 --> 00:10:18,202 -[grunts] -[yawns] Yeah. 255 00:10:19,271 --> 00:10:21,241 -I wonder what time it is. -Yeah. 256 00:10:22,912 --> 00:10:25,082 -Oh, my God. -Wow. 257 00:10:25,684 --> 00:10:27,287 -It's early. -So early. 258 00:10:27,420 --> 00:10:29,826 -Night is young. [chuckles] -Huh. 259 00:10:29,892 --> 00:10:32,464 [chuckles] Whole night's ahead of us. 260 00:10:32,531 --> 00:10:33,833 Yeah. 261 00:10:40,213 --> 00:10:41,549 What did you say? 262 00:10:41,616 --> 00:10:43,554 -Sorry? -What did you just say? 263 00:10:43,753 --> 00:10:46,124 I was Just Deep breath. 264 00:10:48,630 --> 00:10:50,299 -[♪♪ club music plays] -Two tequila shots, please. 265 00:10:50,433 --> 00:10:51,837 [bartender] You wanna start a tab? 266 00:10:51,904 --> 00:10:54,107 Oh, no. Uh, I know Tiffany Kindler. 267 00:10:54,809 --> 00:10:56,378 -Who? -Uh, Tiffany Kindler. 268 00:10:56,378 --> 00:10:56,379 -Who? -Uh, Tiffany Kindler. She's friends with Aubrey Moss. 269 00:10:56,379 --> 00:10:58,382 She's friends with Aubrey Moss. 270 00:10:58,449 --> 00:11:02,591 Yeah, so, my friend Doug Reilly is actually cousins with Jordan Miller. 271 00:11:02,658 --> 00:11:04,563 Oh. 272 00:11:04,629 --> 00:11:06,398 Look, if it's a problem, I can call John-Paul Mark. It's not a big deal. 273 00:11:06,465 --> 00:11:08,269 It's his daughter's birthday, but he'll answer for me. 274 00:11:08,302 --> 00:11:10,106 -No, no, that's fine. It's on the house. -Thanks. 275 00:11:13,045 --> 00:11:14,515 John-Paul Mark? 276 00:11:14,982 --> 00:11:17,086 [laughs] Two first names is pushing it, but three? 277 00:11:17,153 --> 00:11:18,823 That's playing with fire. 278 00:11:18,890 --> 00:11:20,459 Sorry, man, I don't know what you're talking about. 279 00:11:21,361 --> 00:11:22,731 The method? 280 00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:25,804 John-Paul Mark and I grew up together. 281 00:11:26,338 --> 00:11:28,811 We lived on a cul-de-sac in Wooster, Ohio. 282 00:11:28,877 --> 00:11:31,650 -You're from Wooster, Ohio? -Mm-hmm. 283 00:11:32,384 --> 00:11:34,087 -What's your high school? -Southeast. 284 00:11:34,254 --> 00:11:35,891 -Southeast? -Go Falcons. 285 00:11:35,958 --> 00:11:37,327 -Falcons. -Three-season athlete. 286 00:11:37,427 --> 00:11:39,264 -What sports? -Fencing, soccer, and swimming. 287 00:11:39,364 --> 00:11:40,968 -Weird combo. -I mean, it got me into Bucknell. 288 00:11:41,034 --> 00:11:42,771 -Bucknell? -Go Bison. 289 00:11:45,309 --> 00:11:47,046 Any more questions, officer? 290 00:11:50,086 --> 00:11:52,357 Go Falcons. Sorry, I thought it was 291 00:11:52,424 --> 00:11:55,931 Sorry. [chuckles] Sorry. [clears throat] 292 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,237 Never let 'em see you sweat, cutie. 293 00:12:00,339 --> 00:12:01,441 [chuckles] 294 00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:07,186 [♪♪ club music continues] 295 00:12:09,224 --> 00:12:10,493 Is she watching? 296 00:12:10,861 --> 00:12:13,633 No, she's just dancing. They literally could not care less. 297 00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:16,606 What? Then how is she supposed to know that I'm winning? 298 00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:21,181 Billie, you can't win at club. Let's just have fun. 299 00:12:22,918 --> 00:12:25,724 Wait, Anton. Tilt-A-Whirl. 300 00:12:25,791 --> 00:12:28,664 -No, I'm not doing that. No. -Yes. Come on, please. Tilt-A-Whirl. 301 00:12:28,731 --> 00:12:31,101 You and Issa do it all the time. It's such a hit. 302 00:12:31,201 --> 00:12:33,807 Billie, please, no. Not right now. Not right now. 303 00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:35,343 No, come on. 304 00:12:38,850 --> 00:12:40,086 Okay, okay. 305 00:12:40,219 --> 00:12:42,290 -Fine, right now. Right now. -Okay. Okay. 306 00:12:42,323 --> 00:12:45,898 -Oops. Sorry. Squeezing through. -[Anton] Excuse me. Sorry. 307 00:12:46,098 --> 00:12:48,036 -[Anton] Hey! Circle up! Make a circle. -[Billie] Circle up, everyone. 308 00:12:48,102 --> 00:12:49,772 -[Billie] Clear some space. -[Anton] Yep. Like that. 309 00:12:49,839 --> 00:12:52,511 Okay, ready? Ready? Whoa. 310 00:12:53,045 --> 00:12:54,749 -I trust you. -Okay. 311 00:12:55,249 --> 00:12:58,222 [crowd cheering, exclaiming] 312 00:13:02,463 --> 00:13:04,468 Oh, God. Oh, fuck! 313 00:13:04,802 --> 00:13:06,807 God. Oh, my God. She's dead. She's dead. 314 00:13:06,939 --> 00:13:08,376 -Ow. Oh, no. Ow. -[Anton] I am so sorry. 315 00:13:08,442 --> 00:13:11,682 Okay. No, I'm fine. I'm fine. [chuckling] Okay. 316 00:13:11,916 --> 00:13:13,119 I'm good. 317 00:13:13,485 --> 00:13:15,256 Okay. [chuckles] 318 00:13:16,425 --> 00:13:18,162 What went wrong? 319 00:13:18,362 --> 00:13:21,001 You're longer than Issa, so I'm just not used to your proportions. 320 00:13:22,070 --> 00:13:23,574 Maybe people thought it was on purpose. 321 00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:25,844 Yeah, maybe one or two people in the back. 322 00:13:25,977 --> 00:13:28,082 -[crickets chirping] -[clicks tongue] 323 00:13:28,516 --> 00:13:31,856 Do you think, uh, some, uh 324 00:13:34,060 --> 00:13:35,463 [stammers] 325 00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:37,467 -[doorbell rings] -[both cheer] 326 00:13:37,535 --> 00:13:39,004 -Dessert's here, dessert's here. -Fuck yeah! 327 00:13:39,137 --> 00:13:40,439 -Let's go get dessert. -Dessert time. 328 00:13:41,041 --> 00:13:41,809 Hi. 329 00:13:41,876 --> 00:13:43,780 Ah. Thank you, sir. 330 00:13:43,847 --> 00:13:45,416 -Ice cream. -Have a nice night. 331 00:13:45,483 --> 00:13:47,186 -[chuckles] Thank you. -Thanks, you too. 332 00:13:50,326 --> 00:13:51,262 Wait, wait. 333 00:13:51,328 --> 00:13:56,104 You have an amazing energy. 334 00:13:56,171 --> 00:13:59,512 [gasps] I feel it. You should come in. Do you wanna come inside? 335 00:13:59,579 --> 00:14:00,614 Oh, yeah. 336 00:14:00,614 --> 00:14:00,647 Oh, yeah. -Not really. -No, you should. 337 00:14:00,647 --> 00:14:02,317 -Not really. -No, you should. 338 00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:03,920 We just made a whole lot of salmon. You like salmon? 339 00:14:03,987 --> 00:14:05,489 You wanna come in, man? Are you a fish guy? 340 00:14:05,557 --> 00:14:06,760 You're gonna love it in here. Wait, what's your name? 341 00:14:06,826 --> 00:14:08,396 -Viktor. -[Issa] Viktor. 342 00:14:08,463 --> 00:14:09,765 -[Paul whispering] Viktor. -[Issa] I love that accent. 343 00:14:09,832 --> 00:14:10,701 -Where are you from? -Poland. 344 00:14:10,768 --> 00:14:11,569 [Issa, Paul] Poland. 345 00:14:17,380 --> 00:14:19,150 [Samir] Okay, okay, let me get thiSo, you you passed down the ID to him? 346 00:14:19,217 --> 00:14:21,823 -Then you passed it on to him? -And then I did it to him. 347 00:14:22,156 --> 00:14:23,793 -This is insane. This is crazy. -Yeah. [laughs] 348 00:14:23,860 --> 00:14:25,764 -Wow, wow, wow. -[laughing] 349 00:14:25,831 --> 00:14:27,401 It's a whole legion of Samirs. 350 00:14:27,534 --> 00:14:29,304 -[friend chuckles] -[Alex] I know. 351 00:14:29,337 --> 00:14:31,909 Hey, question, um-um, do you use any products on your hair 352 00:14:31,976 --> 00:14:33,714 -like-like a mousse? -Ah. 353 00:14:33,781 --> 00:14:35,851 No mousse. Mousse Mousse doesn't agree with our texture. 354 00:14:35,917 --> 00:14:37,354 -[Alex] No mousse. -Okay, thank you. 355 00:14:37,453 --> 00:14:39,224 -Uh, I actually use a curling gel. -[all] Oh. 356 00:14:39,290 --> 00:14:40,459 -Yeah, no mousse. -[glass shatters] 357 00:14:40,527 --> 00:14:43,065 Sorry, not my fault. 358 00:14:43,900 --> 00:14:45,604 Not my fault. 359 00:14:45,604 --> 00:14:47,340 Ah, shit, um Hey, I gotta 360 00:14:47,406 --> 00:14:49,344 -Gotta take care of something real quick. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. 361 00:14:49,444 --> 00:14:51,348 -But, guys, real quick tip. -[Alex] Mmm? 362 00:14:51,448 --> 00:14:53,118 -There's actually hooks under here. -What? 363 00:14:53,185 --> 00:14:54,488 Yep, you just go ahead and put your coats on those. 364 00:14:54,622 --> 00:14:56,191 -[friend cheers] -Get the fuck out of here. 365 00:14:56,291 --> 00:14:57,594 -Yo. Dude. -Are you serious right now? 366 00:14:57,694 --> 00:15:00,133 And I know Naomi Isabella from college, 367 00:15:00,199 --> 00:15:02,972 and Naomi Isabella freelanced for, um 368 00:15:03,172 --> 00:15:05,342 For Gary Von Patio. 369 00:15:06,411 --> 00:15:07,480 Hi. 370 00:15:07,548 --> 00:15:09,151 Hi. 371 00:15:09,585 --> 00:15:10,921 -Right, yes. -Yeah. 372 00:15:11,054 --> 00:15:12,892 And, um, Gary Von Patio started dating 373 00:15:12,959 --> 00:15:14,427 Georgia Tralala. 374 00:15:14,494 --> 00:15:16,699 Yeah, that was before she opened Bowery Playhouse, 375 00:15:16,966 --> 00:15:19,171 which sadly has gotten less experimental over the years. 376 00:15:19,237 --> 00:15:21,041 -But you got to keep the lights on. -Yeah. 377 00:15:21,108 --> 00:15:22,477 And that's how we know 378 00:15:22,578 --> 00:15:26,519 [both] Steve Winslow, who owns the club. 379 00:15:26,586 --> 00:15:29,458 -Thank you. [chuckles] Thanks. -[hostess] Mm-hmm. 380 00:15:29,592 --> 00:15:31,328 -Gary Von Patio? -Bowery Playhouse? 381 00:15:31,394 --> 00:15:33,031 [chuckles] I just reached for it and there it was. 382 00:15:33,198 --> 00:15:34,134 -It came to me. -Your mind. 383 00:15:34,201 --> 00:15:36,438 [♪♪ club music playing] 384 00:15:37,073 --> 00:15:40,079 You're so lucky you like your fake ID family, 385 00:15:40,212 --> 00:15:42,785 and they don't make you feel lame as shit. 386 00:15:43,152 --> 00:15:46,425 No, they actually They made me feel, like, wise and mature. 387 00:15:46,491 --> 00:15:47,628 Pfft. 388 00:15:48,095 --> 00:15:49,565 When did we get mature? 389 00:15:50,032 --> 00:15:53,239 You know, I I mean, I feel like we just started having fun. 390 00:15:53,405 --> 00:15:55,109 What now, is it over already? 391 00:15:55,342 --> 00:15:56,613 I don't know. 392 00:15:57,013 --> 00:15:58,449 I think it's kind of nice. 393 00:15:59,017 --> 00:16:00,987 Like, we're not the dumbest people anymore. 394 00:16:01,254 --> 00:16:02,390 [scoffs] 395 00:16:02,490 --> 00:16:04,027 Like, there's kids that know less than us. 396 00:16:05,429 --> 00:16:07,735 Do you wanna know why I got Look at me. 397 00:16:08,001 --> 00:16:11,542 Do you wanna know why I got my fake ID when I was 16? 398 00:16:11,542 --> 00:16:13,980 To drink and black out? 399 00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:16,385 To join a WeWork. 400 00:16:16,753 --> 00:16:18,891 [laughs] What? 401 00:16:19,658 --> 00:16:22,463 [crying] And then I got scared, and I didn't even go. 402 00:16:22,531 --> 00:16:26,706 -Oh, Billie. [chuckling] No, no, that's -[cries] I mean 403 00:16:26,773 --> 00:16:28,041 [chuckles] 404 00:16:28,175 --> 00:16:31,816 -I'm unemployed. I'm not cool. -No. 405 00:16:32,016 --> 00:16:35,056 And what if If If I'm not young anymore [crying] then what am I even? 406 00:16:35,256 --> 00:16:36,793 Billie, you don't 407 00:16:37,026 --> 00:16:38,530 Okay, well, you don't want to be that young anymore. 408 00:16:38,596 --> 00:16:40,266 No, you don't wanna be 20 years old. 409 00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:43,907 Twenty-year-olds, they're all like shallow and weird, 410 00:16:44,073 --> 00:16:45,644 and they only care about sex. 411 00:16:45,644 --> 00:16:45,678 and they only care about sex. Like, you're not like that. 412 00:16:45,678 --> 00:16:47,548 Like, you're not like that. 413 00:16:47,581 --> 00:16:49,552 Like, I bet I bet Sophie-Rose is just here to hook up with some guy 414 00:16:49,685 --> 00:16:51,455 that she's never gonna think about ever again. 415 00:16:51,556 --> 00:16:53,760 And she's getting what, to look cool for one night? 416 00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:53,793 And she's getting what, to look cool for one night? Like, we're not those people. 417 00:16:53,793 --> 00:16:55,329 Like, we're not those people. 418 00:16:55,429 --> 00:16:58,603 Like, we make memories that, like, last a long time. 419 00:16:58,636 --> 00:17:00,039 Billie, Billie. 420 00:17:00,139 --> 00:17:02,778 -Which one of you is the oldest? -Me. 421 00:17:02,811 --> 00:17:04,080 Great. 422 00:17:04,213 --> 00:17:05,684 -Follow me. -Ooh, where we going? 423 00:17:05,750 --> 00:17:08,623 Billie, no, no, that one has therapy in the morning. 424 00:17:08,957 --> 00:17:10,594 Goddamn it. 425 00:17:11,228 --> 00:17:13,432 Oh. [chuckling] Oh, my God, you're so funny. 426 00:17:13,566 --> 00:17:15,704 Ah. [chuckles] I didn't say anything. 427 00:17:15,771 --> 00:17:17,073 [gasps] 428 00:17:17,608 --> 00:17:20,648 [chuckling] Okay, what are we doing here? You're you, I'm me. 429 00:17:20,680 --> 00:17:21,750 What? 430 00:17:22,283 --> 00:17:23,820 You're Billie. 431 00:17:24,053 --> 00:17:26,058 Uh, I'm just a Samir who hasn't even found his Carly yet. 432 00:17:26,124 --> 00:17:28,262 -What? No, no, no, no, no. -I don't think that I'm right for you-- 433 00:17:28,328 --> 00:17:30,801 No. I'm not actually trying to have sex with you, okay? 434 00:17:31,067 --> 00:17:33,773 I just want that girl to think that I'm having sex with you 435 00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:36,278 -All right. -because I'm fun and good at club. 436 00:17:36,478 --> 00:17:37,648 -Okay. Okay. -Okay? 437 00:17:37,648 --> 00:17:38,884 So, can you help me out? 438 00:17:39,450 --> 00:17:41,522 Yeah. Yeah. Okay. 439 00:17:42,256 --> 00:17:43,392 [moaning] 440 00:17:46,197 --> 00:17:48,503 [both moaning] 441 00:17:48,570 --> 00:17:50,507 [deeper moaning] 442 00:17:52,209 --> 00:17:54,380 [Billie] Oh, I love having sex in the club. 443 00:17:54,447 --> 00:17:57,621 -[moans] I've never had sex in a club. -Yeah. I have. 444 00:17:57,654 --> 00:17:59,157 Oh, ma Oh, wow. 445 00:17:59,224 --> 00:18:01,394 -Oh, fuck. Oh, my God. -You're so good at this. Oh, my God. 446 00:18:01,562 --> 00:18:03,399 -I'm good at this. -Yeah. 447 00:18:03,599 --> 00:18:04,802 -Yeah, what about me? Am I good at this? -Oh, you're so good at this. 448 00:18:04,869 --> 00:18:05,837 [Billie] Thank you. 449 00:18:05,904 --> 00:18:07,641 [moaning continues] 450 00:18:10,513 --> 00:18:11,649 [moaning ends] 451 00:18:12,518 --> 00:18:13,820 [mouthing words] That should be good. 452 00:18:16,258 --> 00:18:17,794 Oh, my God, did you just have sex in there? 453 00:18:17,861 --> 00:18:18,896 Yep. 454 00:18:18,896 --> 00:18:18,930 Yep. -Wait, in the bathroom? -Yep. 455 00:18:18,930 --> 00:18:20,132 -Wait, in the bathroom? -Yep. 456 00:18:20,299 --> 00:18:21,703 -With a stranger? -Yes, sir. 457 00:18:21,802 --> 00:18:24,407 -Did you use protection? -Nada, chica. 458 00:18:24,775 --> 00:18:25,744 Ew. 459 00:18:25,744 --> 00:18:27,013 [Sophie-Rose] Oh, God. 460 00:18:27,614 --> 00:18:29,685 Okay, like you guys aren't all here to hook up? [chuckles] 461 00:18:29,752 --> 00:18:33,025 Um, no, we are here to hang out with our friends. 462 00:18:33,258 --> 00:18:34,427 Okay, um, 463 00:18:35,964 --> 00:18:37,834 I'm gonna help you, okay? 464 00:18:38,536 --> 00:18:40,139 -I don't-- -Alana? 465 00:18:40,406 --> 00:18:42,845 -[Alana] Yeah. -That woman from before, you remember? 466 00:18:42,878 --> 00:18:44,113 Yeah? 467 00:18:44,247 --> 00:18:45,784 She just got rawdogged in the bathroom 468 00:18:45,851 --> 00:18:47,655 -[stammers] -so I'm gonna take her to get a Plan B. 469 00:18:47,721 --> 00:18:49,625 -[Alana] Not rawdogged. -That's not necessary, Sophie-Rose. 470 00:18:49,692 --> 00:18:52,531 -[Alana] You're an angel, Sophie-Rose. -They're gone! 471 00:18:52,664 --> 00:18:54,301 [Issa] Next one, next one, next one. 472 00:18:54,368 --> 00:18:56,839 Okay, okay. Uh, oh, uh, it's a famous classic movie. 473 00:18:56,872 --> 00:18:58,977 Oh, what is it called? Um, the one where they're chocolate, 474 00:18:59,043 --> 00:19:01,182 and they're candy, and the green one that has legs. 475 00:19:01,248 --> 00:19:03,152 Uh, that's, uh, MandM's commercial. 476 00:19:03,218 --> 00:19:05,624 It's, like, uh, one of my favorite movies. I watched it in film class. 477 00:19:05,691 --> 00:19:07,695 - Citizen Kane? -Yes, Viktor. 478 00:19:07,762 --> 00:19:09,397 - Kane, Kane, Kane, Kane. -[Paul] Yes, dude. Nice. 479 00:19:09,464 --> 00:19:11,569 Oh, uh, okay. I had this as a pet as a kid. 480 00:19:11,636 --> 00:19:13,105 Oh, I had a dog, a bull terrier. 481 00:19:13,171 --> 00:19:14,207 I had a bull terrier. Bull terrier! 482 00:19:14,274 --> 00:19:16,178 I My pet. I had this pet. 483 00:19:16,244 --> 00:19:17,715 -You -Parakeet? 484 00:19:17,782 --> 00:19:20,687 Yes, Viktor. P Yes, Viktor, yeah, what the hell? 485 00:19:20,754 --> 00:19:23,760 -What? [chuckles] Viktor. Viktor. -[Paul] Yes. 486 00:19:24,094 --> 00:19:25,563 Gotcha! [chuckles] 487 00:19:25,630 --> 00:19:27,735 Okay, uh, he's a famous baseball player. He's, uh 488 00:19:27,801 --> 00:19:30,172 Oh, easy, it's my dad's first name and then the month I was born. 489 00:19:30,305 --> 00:19:31,675 Oh, so it's Steve! Steve October! 490 00:19:31,742 --> 00:19:33,846 I know it's Steve October. It's Steve October. 491 00:19:33,846 --> 00:19:33,880 I know it's Steve October. It's Steve October. Give me that. Steve October. 492 00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:35,583 Give me that. Steve October. 493 00:19:37,286 --> 00:19:38,890 Willie Mays? 494 00:19:39,725 --> 00:19:41,261 Yeah, Viktor. [stammers] 495 00:19:41,996 --> 00:19:43,866 Baseball player Willie Mays. 496 00:19:44,300 --> 00:19:45,571 It's a good guess, though. 497 00:19:45,637 --> 00:19:47,575 [Billie] Sophie-Rose, I'm fine. 498 00:19:47,741 --> 00:19:50,113 I just had cool casual sex. 499 00:19:50,312 --> 00:19:52,016 I don't need it, okay? 500 00:19:52,249 --> 00:19:54,087 Actually, maybe we should get you a Gatorade 'cause you seem drunk. 501 00:19:54,320 --> 00:19:56,425 Thank you so much. Just sorry about her. Ignore her. 502 00:19:56,491 --> 00:19:57,794 I'm taking care of her 'cause she's drunk. 503 00:19:57,928 --> 00:19:59,565 No, she's not taking care of me, okay. 504 00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:01,936 Sophie-Rose, I'm not gonna take it. 505 00:20:03,105 --> 00:20:07,246 Oh, is it because it's your last chance to have kids? 506 00:20:09,551 --> 00:20:10,887 [Billie] Give me that. 507 00:20:13,993 --> 00:20:16,665 Let me see your tongue. Let me see your tongue. 508 00:20:17,734 --> 00:20:19,237 Under. 509 00:20:19,739 --> 00:20:20,807 [swallows] 510 00:20:21,809 --> 00:20:24,447 Amazing. Okay, I'm gonna go pay. 511 00:20:25,650 --> 00:20:29,423 And remember, your generation fought for this. 512 00:20:38,876 --> 00:20:43,352 Hi, uh, what happens if you take Plan B on an empty stomach? 513 00:20:43,820 --> 00:20:45,657 -On an empty stomach? You-- -No, no, no, no. 514 00:20:45,790 --> 00:20:47,561 On an empty [whispering] uterus. 515 00:20:48,930 --> 00:20:51,434 [whispering] Does anything bad come out? 516 00:20:57,648 --> 00:20:59,217 [Anton] Do you track Billie or not? 517 00:20:59,284 --> 00:21:01,923 Yeah, it says her location was here seven minutes ago. 518 00:21:02,257 --> 00:21:03,894 Okay, well, where should we go next? 519 00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:05,763 [Anton's friend] Hmm. 520 00:21:05,763 --> 00:21:05,764 [Anton's friend] Hmm. There's this piano bar where the waiters fully abuse you, or 521 00:21:05,764 --> 00:21:07,400 There's this piano bar where the waiters fully abuse you, or 522 00:21:07,466 --> 00:21:09,204 -No, that. Immediately. Let's go. -Right? 523 00:21:09,403 --> 00:21:11,241 [sighs] Okay, you really don't have to pay me back. It's fine. 524 00:21:11,308 --> 00:21:13,411 -[Billie] Yes, I do. -Can you at least just Venmo me then? 525 00:21:13,646 --> 00:21:16,317 -[Billie] No, because my phone died. -[knocks on door] 526 00:21:17,654 --> 00:21:19,391 Oh, no, you're not supposed to do that. 527 00:21:19,457 --> 00:21:22,831 [chuckling] Okay. Says the girl who just had sex with a stranger. 528 00:21:22,898 --> 00:21:24,134 Here you go, dude. 529 00:21:24,535 --> 00:21:26,104 Okay, give me your fucking money right now! 530 00:21:26,171 --> 00:21:28,242 -Oh, my fucking God! -Give me your fucking money! 531 00:21:28,375 --> 00:21:29,645 My name My name is Billie Schaeffer. 532 00:21:29,712 --> 00:21:31,448 -Please don't hurt me, okay? -Oh, my God! 533 00:21:31,515 --> 00:21:33,218 It says she should be right here. 534 00:21:33,418 --> 00:21:34,622 -[clamoring] -Oh! 535 00:21:34,755 --> 00:21:36,458 -Oh, no! -[Anton] Oh, my, God, Billie! 536 00:21:36,526 --> 00:21:38,095 -Billie! -Oh, my God. 537 00:21:38,361 --> 00:21:39,999 Who the fuck are they? Give me Give me some cash or give me 538 00:21:40,066 --> 00:21:42,102 [stammers] I need a card. I need a credit card. 539 00:21:42,102 --> 00:21:42,103 [stammers] I need a card. I need a credit card. -I don't have a credit card on me. -[Anton's friend] Me either. 540 00:21:42,103 --> 00:21:43,573 -I don't have a credit card on me. -[Anton's friend] Me either. 541 00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:45,242 [both] I never pay for drinks. 542 00:21:45,544 --> 00:21:47,480 -Stop, stop, stop, stop. -Open it! Open it! 543 00:21:47,681 --> 00:21:49,183 I'm trying, Billie. I'm tapping my Apple Pay, but it's not working. 544 00:21:49,250 --> 00:21:50,887 -Who the fuck's that? Hurry up. -No, I just No, don't 545 00:21:51,020 --> 00:21:53,092 Okay, ready? Three, two, one, pull. 546 00:21:53,325 --> 00:21:55,698 [shouting] No, it's three, two, one, on the one you pull. 547 00:21:55,830 --> 00:21:57,534 -I'll push. -Three, two, push. 548 00:21:57,601 --> 00:21:59,939 -Are you pushing? Not one. -It's not a push. It's not push. 549 00:22:00,006 --> 00:22:02,243 -[robber] Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. -Calm down. Calm down, okay? 550 00:22:02,310 --> 00:22:05,750 Okay, sir, we are going to get cash out to give you. 551 00:22:05,850 --> 00:22:09,057 -[screams] -[Billie screams] Oh, my God. 552 00:22:09,123 --> 00:22:12,263 -Are you fucking kidding me, Sophie-Rose? -[crying] I'm sorry! 553 00:22:12,496 --> 00:22:14,701 -Oh, no, no, no. -It's bad. We're watching Billie go blind. 554 00:22:14,768 --> 00:22:16,940 [robber] Okay, shut the fuck up. Shut up! 555 00:22:17,006 --> 00:22:19,444 Hey, I know the police chief Bob Zimmer, and he's gonna give you the fucking chair. 556 00:22:19,578 --> 00:22:21,515 Just shut up. Shut up. Get back. 557 00:22:21,615 --> 00:22:24,287 Okay, everybody, just take a fucking breath! 558 00:22:24,420 --> 00:22:26,024 -[Sophie-Rose crying] -[shouts] Okay? 559 00:22:27,359 --> 00:22:28,328 Okay. 560 00:22:28,763 --> 00:22:31,936 I'm giving you my bag. It's plastic and it's $15. 561 00:22:32,002 --> 00:22:34,140 -Sophie-Rose, give him your bag. -[crying] No. 562 00:22:34,207 --> 00:22:36,646 -Give him your bag, Sophie-Rose. -Give the bag. 563 00:22:36,712 --> 00:22:41,121 Sir, that is Miu Miu. It's one step down from Prada. I looked it up earlier. 564 00:22:41,154 --> 00:22:43,693 -[Sophie-Rose crying] -[Billie] Now, just leave the vestibule. 565 00:22:43,759 --> 00:22:45,596 -He's gone, Billie. He's gone. -Oh, my God. Thanks. 566 00:22:45,763 --> 00:22:47,500 -He's gone. -Oh, my God. 567 00:22:47,568 --> 00:22:50,507 -[crying] Oh, fucking shit. What the fuck? -Are you okay? [panting] 568 00:22:51,508 --> 00:22:54,013 -I'm hailing a cab. -Oh, my God, I want to go home. 569 00:22:54,080 --> 00:22:56,519 Yeah, I know, Sophie-Rose. We're going to take you home. 570 00:22:56,652 --> 00:22:58,255 [crying] No, I mean home to Michigan. 571 00:22:58,756 --> 00:23:01,929 Like, everything is so stressful. It's scary. 572 00:23:02,029 --> 00:23:05,803 The laundry in my building, it's never worked. 573 00:23:06,772 --> 00:23:08,510 I have so much dirty clothes. 574 00:23:08,576 --> 00:23:11,883 -Laundry's tough. -[crying] Everything is just so hard here, 575 00:23:11,950 --> 00:23:14,420 and I don't feel anything like Carrie Bradshaw. 576 00:23:14,487 --> 00:23:15,957 Okay, where are you? 577 00:23:15,957 --> 00:23:17,226 Like, anything like her. 578 00:23:17,527 --> 00:23:19,130 Okay, come here, come here, come here. Okay. 579 00:23:19,163 --> 00:23:21,000 -I think I'm having a panic attack. -No, you're okay. 580 00:23:21,067 --> 00:23:23,038 -I think that's what this is. -You're okay. You're okay. 581 00:23:23,338 --> 00:23:26,779 -[breathes deeply] -How did you even know how to handle that? 582 00:23:27,881 --> 00:23:32,456 It comes with age, I guess. 583 00:23:32,657 --> 00:23:34,361 -[chuckles] -Ow. 584 00:23:34,427 --> 00:23:36,497 [stammers] We were just mugged. That was that was crazy. 585 00:23:36,565 --> 00:23:39,270 [stammers] He had a gun. He had a gun. 586 00:23:39,739 --> 00:23:43,546 That was crazy. [stammers] Has that happened to you? [stammers] 587 00:23:48,589 --> 00:23:49,858 Sorry, um 588 00:23:50,794 --> 00:23:52,731 I'm married. [stammers] 589 00:23:53,432 --> 00:23:54,433 To who? 590 00:23:54,500 --> 00:23:57,774 Um Uh, his name is Paul Baker. 591 00:23:59,979 --> 00:24:02,617 Well, that's the fakest name I've heard all night. 592 00:24:03,753 --> 00:24:05,223 -[door opens] -[Issa] Hi, hi, hi, hi! 593 00:24:05,289 --> 00:24:07,126 They're here. We found you guys. We tracked you. 594 00:24:07,159 --> 00:24:08,596 We tracked you. 595 00:24:08,696 --> 00:24:10,032 -[Paul] Hi, friends. Hi. Hi, hi, hi. -Hi. 596 00:24:10,132 --> 00:24:12,971 -Paul Baker. Nice to meet you. -Oh, this is 597 00:24:13,606 --> 00:24:15,075 -[Paul stammers] Where we going? -The cab. 598 00:24:15,175 --> 00:24:16,679 -[Paul] Where we going? -I'm going to get in this cab. 599 00:24:16,746 --> 00:24:17,748 [Paul] No! Guys, the night just started. 600 00:24:17,814 --> 00:24:19,217 Um, it was so nice to meet you. 601 00:24:19,284 --> 00:24:20,887 -No, no, no, no. To the next bar. -I am so sorry. 602 00:24:20,987 --> 00:24:23,091 -[Paul] Anton, please. -[Issa] Come on. Come on. 603 00:24:23,124 --> 00:24:26,632 -So lame. Come on. -Guys, the night is the night is young. 604 00:24:28,135 --> 00:24:29,738 [both sigh] 605 00:24:30,540 --> 00:24:31,975 [chuckles] 606 00:24:33,244 --> 00:24:36,250 -Ah. -[chuckles] Hey, what the hell? 607 00:24:36,250 --> 00:24:36,284 -Ah. -[chuckles] Hey, what the hell? -Hey. What's up? -Who are you 608 00:24:36,284 --> 00:24:38,656 -Hey. What's up? -Who are you 609 00:24:38,756 --> 00:24:40,594 and why is this such an awesome little jacket? 610 00:24:40,793 --> 00:24:41,963 Yeah. You look great. Yeah. 611 00:24:42,029 --> 00:24:43,867 -Okay, where we going? -[Issa] We're gonna go 612 00:24:43,933 --> 00:24:45,536 Uh, we're going out for the best night ever. [chuckles] 613 00:24:45,703 --> 00:24:47,607 [♪♪ "Baddest" playing] 614 00:24:47,674 --> 00:24:49,310 ♪♪ I'm the baddest bitch In this club ♪♪ 615 00:24:49,376 --> 00:24:51,214 ♪♪ Who's the baddest bitch In this club? ♪♪ 616 00:24:51,515 --> 00:24:53,418 ♪♪ I'm the baddest bitch In this club ♪♪ 617 00:24:53,485 --> 00:24:56,659 ♪♪ When the saints Go marching in ♪♪ 618 00:24:56,726 --> 00:24:58,328 ♪♪ Go marching in ♪♪ 619 00:24:58,395 --> 00:25:02,103 ♪♪ Oh, Lord, I want to be In that number ♪♪ 620 00:25:02,202 --> 00:25:05,644 ♪♪ When the saints Go marching in ♪♪ 621 00:25:05,710 --> 00:25:07,547 ♪♪ Go marching in ♪♪ 622 00:25:07,714 --> 00:25:09,618 [♪♪ "Baddest" continues playing] 623 00:25:09,685 --> 00:25:11,188 ♪♪ Let's go, let's get it Let's go ♪♪ 624 00:25:11,522 --> 00:25:13,092 ♪♪ Hands up Hands up ♪♪ 625 00:25:13,224 --> 00:25:15,262 ♪♪ Hands up Hands up ♪♪ 626 00:25:15,262 --> 00:25:15,329 ♪♪ Hands up Hands up ♪♪ ♪♪ Okay Let's go ♪♪ 627 00:25:15,329 --> 00:25:16,999 ♪♪ Okay Let's go ♪♪ 628 00:25:17,066 --> 00:25:18,970 ♪♪ I'm the baddest bitch In this club ♪♪ 629 00:25:19,036 --> 00:25:20,973 ♪♪ Who's the baddest bitch In this club? ♪♪ 630 00:25:21,074 --> 00:25:22,978 ♪♪ I'm the baddest bitch In this club ♪♪ 631 00:25:23,011 --> 00:25:24,948 ♪♪ Who's the baddest bitch In this club? ♪♪ 632 00:25:25,048 --> 00:25:27,587 ♪♪ I'm the baddest bitch In this club ♪♪ 633 00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:29,591 ♪♪ Hey, what Hey, what ♪♪ 634 00:25:29,658 --> 00:25:31,361 ♪♪ Hey, what Hey, what ♪♪ 635 00:25:31,628 --> 00:25:33,365 ♪♪ Shake that thing Shake that thing ♪♪ 636 00:25:33,666 --> 00:25:35,369 ♪♪ Shake that thing Yo, yo ♪♪ 637 00:25:35,436 --> 00:25:37,306 ♪♪ Go, go, go, go Go, go, go, go ♪♪ 638 00:25:37,373 --> 00:25:39,043 ♪♪ Go, go, go, go Go, go, go, go ♪♪ 639 00:25:39,110 --> 00:25:40,980 ♪♪ Go, go, go, go Go, go, go, go ♪♪ 640 00:25:41,080 --> 00:25:43,652 ♪♪ I'm the baddest bitch In this club ♪♪